What is a Bachelor Party?
The bachelor party is the last hurrah. It’s the bachelor’s sendoff from single life into never-ending monogamy. Their one last chance to blow it out without repercussions. Kind of.
It’s the groom’s chance to blow off some steam, but it’s really a chance for everyone to let loose a little.
The groom’s closest friends and family usually attend the bachelor party. Their brothers, future brothers-in-law, father, future fathers-in-law, cousins, and any of their friends who they want to be there.
Instead of “your vibe attracts your tribe,” this is more of a “your tribe attracts your vibe.” Who attends the event is a significant factor in what kind of party it will be.
It won’t get too out of control if your future in-laws are there. I’m not saying it won’t be fun, but you and all your friends will probably be a little more reserved.
If it’s all close friends who have known each other for a long time and have a history, that can get downright dirty. Your tribe attracts your vibe. You decide what kind of party you want it to be.
Needless to say, it’s an excellent chance for everyone to get together and create lasting memories. Some that you’ll share with others and some that you won’t.
Today's Bachelor Party
However, the bachelor parties of yesterday are gone. It used to be that your group would go out and tear it up for a night. Go to the closest big city and get after it for a night or two. These days, bachelors are going big with bucket list locations and elaborate events.
Every time I hear about a bachelor party, it’s bigger and better than the last one I went on. And I’m no better. I chose Costa Rica for my bachelor party.
I was thirty-six when I got married, so my friends had the money to do something fun. Not only that, but they were dying for something fun to do.
These parties are full-on vacations now. But it’s great! If you do it the right way, it lets the bachelor have one last hurrah, enables the group to revel in that debauchery, creates last memories, and they can be incredible vacations.
Who Plans the Bachelor Party?
Traditionally, the best man plans the party. However, it doesn’t have to be. The event can be scheduled by anyone, including the groom himself. It can also be a group effort.
My only advice here is to not have too many chefs in the kitchen. The more opinions you have, the harder it is to make decisions and accomplish things.
People are breezy when it comes to what happens at a bachelor party. So have one or two people take the lead, and the rest will follow.
Who Gets Invited?
When it comes down to it, the groom is really the one who determines who gets invited. They may be close with their future in-laws and want to ensure they’re invited. Or they may have a good relationship with them but won’t feel comfortable letting loose if they’re there.
Whoever gets invited, it’s a privilege to be on that list, and it’s up to them to make it a memorable experience for the bachelor.
As the planner, you’ll want to get started with a group email to everyone the groom wants to invite. No need to bcc the list. Everyone will want to see who’s invited.
Make sure to include to reply to only you in the email. Everyone knows how annoying it is to have fifty people respond to the whole group. You’ll also want to avoid group texts at this point. Wait until you have the final group for a text chain.
Get the original email out to let people know about the event. Include possible dates and the location.
It’s also good if you can throw in a ballpark cost. That will be a significant factor for several people in most groups. Ask people to respond back directly to you with their level of interest. This will help with starting to plan for accommodations.
Destinations
The list of potential locations for a bachelor party is endless. It really comes down to what the bachelor wants.
Spring Training
If you have a group of baseball fans, this is an excellent little bucket list item. You can choose multiple locations, and each has its benefits.
Sporting Events
World Series, Superbowl, any baseball or football game, World Cup, soccer game overseas, MLS game, NBA, playoff games, Nascar, Formula 1, Olympics. You could make the whole trip about that sporting event or have the sport as a planned event for the weekend.
New Orleans
This is one of my favorite cities, and I’ve been to multiple bachelor parties there. They have food and music, they’re loose with the alcohol laws, and the people-watching is phenomenal.
New Orleans has an almost anything-goes mentality. You can hit this on a regular weekend or go big with Jazz Fest or Mardi Gras.
Austin
This Texas city has been a hot spot for a while now. Austin has areas to stick to depending on what you’re looking for and your age demographic. I was just down there for a bachelor party during a Texas Longhorn football game, and it was awesome!
NYC
You can do a bachelor party in just about any big city, and it’s going to be fun. However, New York City is New York City.
I’ve been there for multiple bachelor parties, and it’s a great city. Make sure you do your homework and plan ahead on this one. Depending on what you’re trying to do, you might need connections or a reservation far in advance.
Montreal
Montreal is a fun city with everything you want for a bachelor party. Not to mention, you get out of the country, and that’s always fun. As with any city, research and reservations are a necessity.
Costa Rica
Did someone say surf camp? This is an awesome destination for a bachelor party.
Funny story, this is where my bachelor party was…I just wasn’t there. Yep, you read that right. I didn’t go to my own bachelor party.
My wife was pregnant then, and Zika had just come onto the scene. It was new, no one knew anything about it, and I didn’t want my kid to come out like Beetlejuice, so I didn’t go.
My wife was pregnant then, and Zika had just come onto the scene. It was new, no one knew anything about it, and I didn’t want my kid to come out like Beetlejuice, so I didn’t go.
However, I heard it was awesome. Ha!
Chicago
This is a fun town. If you’re a baseball fan, make sure you hit Wrigley. You need to go to Wrigley even if you’re not a baseball fan. Another big city, so make plans and reserve ahead
of time.
Las Vegas
It’s called Sin City for a reason. Vegas has everything that you could want. However, a massive group of guys isn’t carrying any weight there.
If you plan appropriately, you’ll be able to avoid being stuck in long lines and common areas. I would skip this destination if you’re not willing to spend money. You need to be ready to throw down on tables and cabanas to have a good time.
Skiing / Snowboarding
I make a group trip with a bunch of guys every year called Bros in the Snow. Cheesy, I know.
It’s a group of about 10 or so of us who all went to High School together. Each year we pick a different ski destination and basically make a bachelor party of it. Except, no bachelor.
Lake Tahoe is an excellent option to tie in some gambling.
Miami
Nightclubs, Day clubs, the beach, rent a boat. There’s plenty to do in Miami.
Key West
You can be active during the day with boats, jet skis, and the beach. You also have plenty of options at night on Duval Street. Good luck managing both.
Kentucky Derby
The Derby is a bucket list item for many people I’ve talked with. The Derby is fun, but several bourbon tours are also close by.
Scottsdale
You know you’re going to at least have dry weather here. Scottsdale is an incredible location for golfers, but it also offers ATVs, good food, and pool parties.
Consider linking it up with the Waste Management Open. I’ve never been but heard great things.
Myrtle Beach
A big group of friends and I used to go to Myrtle for golf trips; they were so much fun.
We would stay at Barefoot Resort & Golf. It’s a great setup because they have little apartments. Good because everyone had their own space but could also assemble in one unit.
We would get in on a Thursday and play a round. Then play two rounds Friday and two rounds on Saturday. They have four great courses right there.
Beyond that, Myrtle is packed with bars, restaurants, and other fun entertainment.
Charleston, SC
Beach, food, golf, Charleston has it, and it has a good feel to it. I have never met anyone who has ever said anything bad about Charleston. You’re almost guaranteed a good time.
Nashville, TN
Not that Nashville has just come on the scene, but over the last ten years, it has been a huge bachelor/bachelorette party destination. From food to music, this city has all the bachelor party necessities.
RV Road Trip
This is a trip unlike any others noted. You can go wherever you want, and you can hit multiple locations. Some of the best stories I’ve heard have come from RV road trips.
Flights
It’s fun to get everyone on the same flight. If not everyone, most people. It makes shuttling to and from the airport much more manageable, and the party starts at the airport.
Check with your hotel on shuttles to and from the airport. You can save on rental vehicles and taxis.
Accommodations
I’m a realtor, so my number one criteria is location, location, location. You want to avoid trying to save on location with a group.
Walkability is huge. Or at least the ability to get an inexpensive cab.
Everyone in the house has a different timeline and urgency on things. Not to mention it’s nearly impossible to get everyone to decide on something.
Put your group in a position where they can easily get access to what they want.
Ideally, you’re able to get a house with enough rooms for everyone to share. In this scenario, you get your space in your designated room, but you’re always with the group. This is where the memories are made. Spend the money on a good house.
If you get hotel rooms, you still want to spend the money. One, more expensive hotels are generally in better locations. Two, you get better pools, bars, and restaurants that come along with great hotels.
The moral of the story, you get what you pay for.
Send the group a few options and let them rank them. Make it easy and do an online poll. This way, everyone is a part of the design of the trip. Also, you might get people in the group familiar with the house, hotel, or area in general that can chime in with some experience.
Events
It’s essential to have things planned, but only plan part of the weekend. Following an itinerary is exhausting and can break up fun moments. Plan 2-3 events for a three-night weekend.
These could be:
- Dinners
- Local food spots (BBQ, tacos, pizza, etc.)
- Strippers/strip clubs
- Sporting events
- Golf
- Concert
- Bourbon tasting
- Paintballing
- Brewery tour
- Nascar
- White water rafting
- Skeet Shooting
- Go-karts
- Sky Diving
- Rock Climbing
- Fly Fishing
- Surfing
- Bar Crawl
- Dune Buggy / ATV
- Hiking
- Off Shore Fishing
Group Meals
If you’re staying in a house, stock up on drinks (beer, liquor, coke, water, Gatorade, etc.) and plenty of snacks. Also, pick up several frozen pizzas and burritos. These are all good for when you’re hanging at the house.
If you have a nice house/kitchen setup, look into having a chef come to the house and cook there. If you’re planning on eating at a restaurant, make sure you plan ahead and book reservations.
Send out a few restaurant options to the group and do a poll. Once you have the picks, make the reservation.
Try to avoid doing it the first night. The whole group may still need to arrive, and the first day with travel is a cluster.
Planning every meal is too much. One or two planned group meals should do the trick.
Who Pays for the Party?
It’s usually every man for themselves. Although, sometimes you have a loaded best man or groom’s parents that will cover things.
Whatever happens, try to take care of the groom as much as possible. Accommodation, flight, dinner, drinks, etc. All of it or some of it. Whatever your group can handle.
Once you have a general budget, send it out to the group. You can include it with the first email about when and where. That way, people know if it’s something they can handle or not.
Keep in mind that not everyone is working with the same budget. If you have a sense of the group, keep that range in mind when picking a destination and accommodations. If you don’t know, ask the groom.
You don’t have to appease everyone, but there will be people that the groom wants to make sure they can attend. Don’t price them out.
Important Considerations
- It’s better to over-communicate details than to undercommunicate. Send emails and texts, and make sure you’re hearing from everyone. I’ve seen people book flights for the wrong dates.
- Plan this any time before the wedding. The further ahead of time you plan, the better. It gives attendees more time to reserve the weekend, set funds aside, and get approval from spouses/work. It also gives you a chance to make reservations for food and events.
- Holiday weekends are great, but people plan those in advance. Make sure you’re planning early and expect to pay more.
- Once people confirm that they’re going, they’re locked in for paying their portion of the trip. Make sure they know that upfront.
- Even if it’s in the US, bring your passport. You want to avoid being $hit out of luck by losing your wallet. In the same thought, bring an extra credit card and keep it in your suitcase.
- Do it right! Make it worth the time and money spent, and make it a weekend to remember for everyone.
